Chipmunk Part I

Step 1: Make an incision from the anus to the bottom lip with a sharp blade. Step 2: Do not puncture the Epithelial tissue that holds the organs in place. Step 3: Remove the pelt and cover it with salt to pull out the moisture.

Goose Part II

Step 7: Remove meat and fat Step 8: Continue boiling. Step 9: Remove more meat and fat. Step 10: Continue boiling. Step 11: Remove more meat and fat. Step 12: Add Borax to water and continue boiling. The Borax will help leach the fat off the bones. Step 13: Soak in Hydrogen Peroxide for a few days to bleach the bones white.

Goose Part I

Step 1: Find a dead goose Step 2: De-feather goose on the living room floor in front of the television so you can watch Law and Order: SVU. Step 3: Boil the goose in a pan too small, then make a late night run to Wal-mart to get a bigger one. Step 4: Be thankful you have a spouse that understands your lunacy.
Step 5: Open all of the windows and put on your winter jacket because being cold is better than that smell... that horrible... horrible smell... Step 6: Store the pot and the goose outside till you buy borax and a hot plate. Next time I'm boiling outside.

Just like mom

A sewing machine, the evening news and a glass of ice water. I'm becoming more like my mom everyday.

Dinosaur Egg

perhaps it was just a dinosaur turd.

i had a feeling this might be a dinosaur egg. i cracked it open to be sure.

Little red toy

Traded my motorcycle for something with heat.